Howdy.
A month ago, I would have introduced myself to you by
explaining my job -- a career I loved and was proud to share. But, one day, on
a family vacation at Walt Disney World, on a phone call I took from the hotel
balcony while the kids played in the room, I became someone else. My beloved
employer of 13 years decided I was not to be a part of their new (majorly
restructured) organization, and my entire introduction dissolved.
Or, maybe, it really just came into focus. I dried my tears,
told my kids the news, and assured them everything happens for the best, and then we
hopped on the bus to Epcot Center. (I'd hate to let a little thing like losing
one's identity spoil a family vacation to Walt Disney World!) A few hours later, my husband returned from several hours of mobile-phone-silenced accreditation testing to hear our major family update while dashing across the park to have dinner.
As we settled in to a new normal, I realized that when I'm not quite as worried about
checking email every chance I get, and I'm not preoccupied in dealing with the latest
office drama . . . the funniest things happen. My kids astound me with all they do and say. (Funny how
they're more engaged when I'm actually LISTENING to them, instead of trying to
get them to be quiet, "just for a minute, while mama makes an important
phone call.")
So, while I figure out what I want to be when I grow up, I'm
committed to finding more balance, more real mama engagement, and more of the
real me (without the corporate trappings of perceived success). Don't get me
wrong -- I love corporate success. I think I'm good at what I do, and I’m proud
of that I’ve accomplished. I love being challenged to build new solutions, and
I want to continue to grow professionally. I’m appreciative of the experience
and relationships I've gained along the way, and I still feel affinity for the company
and people that gave me the chance to build that part of my life. Oh, and that
regular paycheck was pretty cool, too. But, I'm committed to prioritizing
differently and enjoying my family to the max, and reinforcing those core, foundational priorities as
I build my new career path.
I'm not there yet. I'm still wrapping up loose ends and transitioning out of my old job. I'm just starting to think about what I'd like to do and be. I know tasks like resume-building and networking and interviewing loom not-so-far-ahead. I'll get there when I'm ready.
In the meantime, I'm enjoying our adventures, from trying
desperately to get us all out the door in the morning, to sports and school and
vacations and letters to Santa. I want to be part of it all, and I want to
learn to be distracted BY my kids, not FROM my kids. I want to dive in
completely and lose myself in their world.
Sometimes, that means putting a cone-shaped, fallen piece of
a pinata on my head and galloping around the forest while making what I assume
might be unicorn sounds. The Elusive Mamacorn is all-in. She doesn't care if
her hair isn't right or the house is messy. She takes "being on time"
with a grain of salt. And, she lives in the moment. Heck, when you're an
Elusive Mamacorn, you sort of get to make the rules, right? I will choose to
have a rollicking good time.
Hey, if you’d like to join along, and maybe share a few of
your own adventures, that’d be swell.
